Auditions

Back to school means I am in for auditions...

Over and over I fool myself into thinking that this will be an easy and less painful battle than before because of how many times I have received that "wonderful ease" of rejection.

It simply does not get easier.
I am still so nervous that my knees shake.
It does not matter the amount of hours spent in preparation it is always the same sticky situation.

I like to think of auditioning in the parable of the nail:

Every time you hit that nail, you understand that your thumb is in danger.
It's like you are hammering a nail, and you hit your thumb...everytime you think to yourself that you have hit the nail before, you can do it again...but then you veer unintentionally off course because one tiny muscle reacted differently...nerves, or you temporarily realize that your thumb may be in danger, or you become too confident, or loose focus for a milli-second... and you hit your thumb.
Every time you hit that nail, you understand that your thumb is in danger. It doesn't matter how skilled you are, or how good your aim is there is always a risk.

Simply stated... this semester out of three strikes on the hammer...I hit my thumb twice.

Happy New Year

Since the new year has come and gone...I feel I must make resolutions...because it's customary.

So...drum roll please!

1. I need to drop some serious poundage. Hey. I want to get married someday...and I think it would be beneficial for that cause.

2. I am going to try not to get mad at my roommates. I have just met them...they are all 19 years old...and come from wealth...in the words of the little engine that could, "I think I can, I think I can."

3. I really want to run a half marathon. Biggest loser has inspired me, and I'ma gonna go for it! and no...this has nothing to do with goal #1, although it does assist.

4. I'd like to audition for some sort of show group...something to get me out of my narrow minded box.

5. I want to go to the temple 50 times this year. minimum. That is one reason for choosing the apartment I did.

That's it. That's all she...or um...I wrote.
I hope that this year is better than the last. for all.